Stepmother has a false notion on how slots
work
October 9,
2009
Dear Mark” My
stepmother likes to play the slots, and she does
quite well at times. She believes starting
off the day by putting in a $100 bill in her
favorite slot machine--rather than several
$20s--produces more, larger payouts. Any
truth to this? Jeff J.
In the book, The Gambler, Fyodor
Dostoevsky wrote; “Can one even as much as touch
a gambling table without becoming immediately
infected with superstition?” Seems your
stepmother is tainted with the groundless belief
in a supernatural agency; a belief, Jeff, held
without reason.
Though I don’t challenge Mom’s right to believe
in the tooth fairy, Jeff, slot machines, do not
operate by artificial intelligence, improving
your stepmother’s payouts in light of her $100
prime-the-machine hunch. If anything, if she
lacks the discipline to get up and walk when
things go south, it could be more costly, in
that she has committed $100 opposed to $20 to a
cybernetic one-armed bandit whose built-in edge
is a predetermined rate, and it wouldn’t matter
one iota what amount she puts in.
Let’s say the return to player rate is 92%. What
that means is that for every $100 your
stepmother puts into the machine, She will be
paid back $92. With all kinds of streaks—good
and bad—appearing, in the long run the machine's
return will tend to its preset rate and have
nothing to do with the opening amount inserted.
Dear Mark: In all your years in the
gambling business, have you ever heard of anyone
filling out a perfect bracket for March Madness?
Although he never wins our office pool, or even
comes close for that matter, a coworker claims
he’s come pretty close in the past. Please prove
it’s bunk. G. R.
Never have, nor will I.
Now before anyone writes in stating anything’s
possible, I suggest you first run the math. Some
quick back-of-the-envelope calculating suggests
that filling out a perfect bracket means
predicting the correct result of all 63 games,
and that would mean your chance of perfection is
one in two to the 63rd power, which just happens
to be one in nine million trillion, that is 1/
9,000,000,000,000,000,000. Sorta pretty, a nine
followed by 18 zeroes, but poor odds, wouldn’t
you say? Your coworker’s odds are far better for
getting hit by a purple asteroid while driving
to the state lottery office to pick up his Mega
Millions winnings, for the second week in a row.
Dear Mark: A long time ago, you wrote
that as a dealer, if the player asked, that you
had no problem giving advice while you dealt the
game. I found such a dealer this weekend in
downtown Reno. Is this really allowed? Aaron K.
Obviously, Aaron, I can’t speak for all casinos’
internal rules and regulations, but of the three
casinos where I pitched cards, in one it was
forbidden, and it could get you more than a
wrist slap; in the second, I guess you could say
they sort of frowned on it, but without
repercussion; and in the third, they didn’t give
a hoot, just so long as when you peeked under
your Ace you then didn’t give advice. All you
can do, Aaron, is ask to see if it’s allowed.
Gambling Wisdom of the Week: “You
will be a sick bo’ if you decide to play this
game because, with one exception, the house edge
ranges from the absurd to the obscene.”
--Frank
Scoblete, Strictly Slots
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