Analogies of greed and
pomposity
5 November 1999
By Mark Pilarski
Dear Mark,
On my last six trips to Gulfport, MS, I've come
home a winner playing slots. I believe it's
beyond luck now. I just have this certain
feeling when to play a particular machine. I've
been so successful lately that I feel I should
go to dollar machines, or higher, versus the
quarter ones and win even more money. Am I on to
something here? Jon S.
Jon, may I share two stories with you? One deals
with arrogance and the other with the incessant
craving for more.
An old Polish folk tale tells of a fisherman who
lives in a hovel by the sea and catches a
magical fish that grants his humble desire for a
cabin and enough to eat. After a week, he is no
longer satisfied and demands larger quarters,
and once again the fish grants him his wish. The
sequence of catch and release repeats itself for
six weeks until the fisherman lives in a castle,
then demands the finest palace. For his
insolence, the fish casts him back to the hovel
by the sea.
For the second story, let's stick with the water
theme. "God himself cannot sink this ship."
Those were the quotes throughout the newspapers
prior to the Titanic making her first passage
across the big pond. She was appropriately
named, as Titans always dared to challenge the
gods, and for their arrogance they were cast
down into hell.
At best, Jon, by challenging the gaming gods
absorbed in your spirit of rapacity, you're on
the Atlantic ocean in a one-man lifeboat with a
slow leak. And the sound I hear? Pssssssss.
Dear Mark,
I very much enjoy the historical questions you
answer. Where do you find the answers to the
most obscure questions? Also, how about trying
mine? Tell me about the history of keno in this
country. Sylvia R.
Around 200 B.C. in China, Cheung Leung
introduced the lottery, the forerunner to modern
day keno, to fund his army. Because of its
overwhelming success, it continued, and
additional proceeds from future lotteries were
used to fund major projects such as the Great
Wall.
In the 1860s when the building of the railroads
in the United States offered promise to Chinese
immigrants, they brought a game, the Chinese
lottery, to America. As the game's popularity
grew, it evolved from a 120-grid ticket used in
the railroad camps to an 80-number ticket called
Keno.
You wanted to know my sources, Sylvia. This
sweetmeat of enlightenment came from the
placemats at the coffee shop at Karl's Silver
Nugget in Sparks, Nevada. Found above the
placemats were cheap, terrific breakfast
specials-and for some readers, that's more
valuable information than the Keno answer.
Dear Mark,
Don't you think that when you write about
long-shot slot machines like Megabucks, you
induce play rather than helping a player refrain
from playing? Stanley F.
The goal of this column is not to shill for the
casinos but to inform players on the exact cost
of an evening's entertainment. I am of the
opinion, Stanley, that players should know
exactly what their chances are of hitting the
big jackpots. Some casinos do post the paybacks
on their machines, but not the true odds of
hitting a jackpot. If they posted the odds, no
one in his right mind would play those machines.
You will note, that I continually write that
your chances are slim to none for a life of
opulence when playing Megabucks.
Unfortunately, no amount of education from me,
nor the casino disclosing the enormous odds
right on a machine, will curb a player's
appetite for hitting it rich. Every slot
participant believes he or she will be the
exception to the rule; she will beat the
celestial gods; it is he who will come home a
victorious contestant against ABC casino.
And every so often, Stanley, to induce a Pavlov
saliva reaction, you will read in the paper that
Mabel, from Ames, Iowa, hit it big, real big.
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