Mind-Reader Dice And
Kitchen Hold'em
29 March 2004
By Mark Pilarski
Dear Mark,
A Great column last week on Don't bettors. It
reminds of a game I was on recently where a guy
threw the number seven about a dozen times
without the point ever being made. He touted
that he had the skill of willing the number
seven. Of course, two hours later, he was broke.
But that still begs this question, do you think
there is any skill involved in throwing dice?
Eddie P.
The telepathic player on the crap game you
describe possessed no second-sighted skills,
because dice, Eddie, have absolutely no notion
of who is throwing them. (Just imagine a sleepy
pair of dice suddenly realizing they'd goofed on
Player Z's last roll and determining to make up
for it next time around.) I will match any
six-year old Monopoly Jr. player against your
crapped-out clairvoyant in producing losing (and
winning) numbers, with the happy casino always
maintaining its house edge. BUT, --there's
always a but--my answer above, Eddie, is based
on honest dice, and on a legitimate game. Are
there any other kinds? Well, yes, shocking as
that may be. A skillful and crooked player, or
an underground illegitimate casino, can
introduce gaffed dice on the game. One example
would be the use of "tops," dice that have
certain numbers omitted. Instead of the six
distinct numbers 1-6, each die has only three
different numbers, each smiling twice from
opposite sides of its die. These defective dice
work like this: One die sports the numbers 1, 3
and 5, while the other shows 2, 4, and 6. This
foul pair cannot roll the numbers 4, 6, 8, and
10 but the can roll 7s all night long.
Another example would be two dice that have only
the numbers 2, 3, and 6 on them. This set will
roll 4, 5, 6, 8 and 9, but it would be
impossible to seven-out. The sucker player just
doesn't catch on because only three sides of a
die are visible at any given time. Yet another
example would be the player who has developed
skill at sliding one or both of them bones
across the table. But any box person not napping
on the game would yell out "NO ROLL," and
mentally mark the slider for close observation.
Then there are loaded dice, also known as
weights, that you can buy at any magic shop.
Loaded dice are "percentage dice," since they do
not win as often as tops do, but they do tilt
the odds in the cheat's favor.
In the years that I boxed a crap game, I never
caught gaffed dice on the table. To introduce
them, the cheats would have had to match the
color and shade of the house dice, imprint the
casino's name and logo on them, and, usually,
match a three-digit number engraved on them.
Even working the late swing shift, I was never
sleepy enough to have missed such painstaking
artwork.
Dear Mark,
I played in a Texas Hold'em tournament amongst
friends. All went well except one hand. Two
players held low clubs as hole cards, and the
community cards were an ace, queen, and jack of
clubs. We split the pot as both players had an
ace high flush. One player thought we should
count back through hole cards for winner. For
future games, how should this be handled? Gene
R.
The affirmative answer is to include each
player's pocket cards. Therefore, using your
example, if the community cards were an Ace,
queen and jack of clubs, and player A had a five
and three of clubs, with player B having a four
and two, player A's five of clubs would accord
him the winning hand. You would only split the
pot if all five cards on the board (the flop,
the turn, and the river) were used to make the
highest flush.
Gambling quote of the Week: "Texas Hold 'em is
not an easy game to play well. To become an
expert you need to be able to balance many
concepts, some of which occasionally contradict
each other." --David Sklansky, author
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