My favorite cee-ment
ponds
23 July 1999
By Mark Pilarski
Dear Mark,
My sister and I love to spend the day by the
pool before we take in a little gambling in the
evening. Since we are going to Las Vegas next
month, do you have any recommendations of hotels
that offer decent pools? Faye K.
Congratulations, Faye, for treating gambling
more like a time-killing recreational activity.
All gamblers when coming to Las Vegas should
plan other activities like visiting the Hoover
Dam, the many fine shows, shopping, health
clubs, tennis or golf. Make it an enjoyable,
entertaining trip, not all gambling. Now for my
favorite cee-ment ponds. I'll first preface my
choices by telling you that gray is my favorite
color, and I love inclement weather, not the
heat or intense sunshine of Las Vegas. But since
you asked, my preferred choices, for all the
wrong reasons, are the swimming holes at the
Rio, the Mirage and the Tropicana: the Rio, not
because they actually have a sandy beach, but
because it's closest to my favorite buffet; the
Mirage, not because it's the place to be seen,
but because I kept a room key from a previous
visit so when my friends stay in Vegas I can
sneak in; and finally, the Tropicana, not
because it has the largest pool or poolside
blackjack, but because if you walk up to the
Island Winners Club, fill out a player
application, and gamble a minimal amount,
they'll give you a room for $39.95.
So based on what you just read, Faye, you really
don't want my opinion. Instead, call the Las
Vegas Chamber for hotel information at (800)
445-8864 and see what they recommend.
Dear Mark,
Why is it that every time the dice fly off the
table, the next number to roll is the seven?
Uncanny isn't it? Should I bet on the seven
every time the dice go off the game? Robert N.
You would think, Robert, that every time you
hear a dealer call "It's on the ground, look
around, it must be found" or "Too tall to call"
that the smart thing to do would be to place a
wager on the number seven because you believe
it's going to roll again. You'd be thinkin'
wrong, pardner. By making this wager part of
your betting repertoire, you could easily be
joining the most pathetic bunch of losers since
my ninth grade remedial shop math class. Why?
Because the probability of a seven showing on
any roll, off the table or not, is only 16.67
percent. Forget what you perceive. Each roll of
the dice always remains the same, an independent
event. More bad news. The one-roll wager on the
seven is the worst bet on the crap table. Casino
advantage, 16.7 percent.
Sorry, Robert, what you perceive as happening
all the time is anecdotal evidence, not reality.
Stay away from this wager!
Dear Mark,
I love the thrill and action of a casino. My
wife, out of fear of making mistakes and being
harassed by other players, prefers to sit in
front of a slot machine. She avoids table games
like the plague. I can't even get her to play
with me on my favorite game, blackjack. Do many
players have this anxiety? Chuck L.
Anyone who has ever been chastised for hitting a
16 when the dealer shows a five can appreciate
the anonymity of a slot machine. Your wife
obviously prefers a non-threatening environment
where her decisions won't be second-guessed.
I'm with you, Chuck. I would love to see your
wife experience table games offering excellent
bets for the player, but who can blame her? Why
get verbally abused for faulty draws when a slot
machine will allow her the freedom to play her
way, at her own pace, without harassment.
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